Episode 315: You Don’t Have a Discipline Problem—You Have a Decision-Making Problem
You know what to do. You’ve tried to do it. But for some reason, it just never sticks—and you’re left wondering if you just lack willpower.
This episode is your reminder that you’re not flaky, uncommitted, or “bad at routines.” You’re just making decisions from the wrong place.
We’re unpacking the real root of burnout and inconsistency: decision fatigue, external pressure, and ignoring your inner guidance. If you’ve ever said “I know what to do, I just don’t do it,” this one’s for you.
Listen to the Episode:
Mentioned in the Episode:
Episode 313: Your Energy Isn’t the Problem—Your Wellness Plan Is
Episode 314: Human Design and Burnout: What Your Energy Type Is Trying to Tell You
Connect with Naomi:
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“Most of your wellness struggles come from decision fatigue, not a lack of discipline, not a lack of willpower and not for a lack of trying. My friend, your Human Design Authority is your guide, it’s how you’re built to make aligned choices. And when you stop outsourcing your decisions and start honoring your energy, you stop burning out. ”
Read the Transcript:
Welcome to the final episode of this mini-series on building wellness around your energy, not based on trends, Tiktok experts, or what that one friend who drinks lemon water with cayenne pepper at 5 am told you to do.
Before we jump in, I have a couple of updates.
One - in the last episode, I said this was a four-part mini-series, but I actually got it confused with another mini-series that I'm currently brainstorming on and tinkering with. So, to clarify, this mini-series ends with this episode, and then next week we start the new one.
Secondly, I want to try something new. A year ago, I dropped Episode 284: A Daily Ritual to Develop a Positive Mindset. This ritual is inspired by the actress, Emma Watson, who's my favorite. I watched an interview where she shared how at the end of her day, she writes three things in her journal – three things that were fun and joyful, three things that were kind--either kindness shown to her or kindness she showed to someone else--and then three things that she likes about herself or that she did well.
Last week, as I was driving down the California coast, I was thinking about the show and ideas for upcoming episodes and had the thought, “Why not open episodes with this ritual?” So, let's give it a try.
Three things that are currently fun or joyful--this is off the cuff…
First is the show “L’Agence.” It's a luxury real estate reality show on Netflix. It’s with a French family--the parents and four sons run their real estate business. It was on French television that Netflix picked up. Last year I binged the first four seasons and loved it. Not only did I get to see Paris—my most favorite city in the world next to San Francisco, I also got to see amazing locations with unbelievable homes. It’s a feel-good show and their grandma's in it too!
Season Five recently dropped, and I have one episode left of it. I'm gonna be sad when it's over, but it's a fun thing that I'm enjoying right now.
The second thing is learning to bake and cook. Last year, the group that I work with had a team-building activity where we took a virtual class and learned how to bake bread. The chef that taught it teaches in-person classes in her local community but also teaches classes virtually on Zoom! She offers a bunch of cooking and baking classes and since last fall, I've taken three or four more classes and I’m registered for a few more this summer, and I have a bunch more that I'm registered for this summer.
I don't have any culinary skills, so it's been fun! The recipes are so good and doable. Some of the things I've made--I can't believe that I made them--like ganache and a tart, things that I never imagined. And not only am I making them, but they taste good too! She teaches in an easy-to-understand way and has substitutes for everything. I don't eat gluten or dairy and she always has options and substitutes to make things gluten-free and dairy-free. But also, if I don't have a particular tool or piece of equipment in the kitchen, she has options for everything. Her name is Chef Laura--I’ll include a link to her in the show notes for this episode. If you're interested in taking any of her classes, I highly recommend it. I love them all.
The third thing that's on my list almost every night is my puppy girl, Coco Pop. She's 11 and I adopted her when she was nine weeks old from the Humane Society. She’s a hoot—sensitive, shy and equally bossy; stubborn and defiant yet obedient. She's everything and I just love her so much--she brings me joy every day.
Now for three things that are kind--either kindness shown to me or kindness I've extended to someone else…
One - as a recovering road-rager, I’m learning to be kind on the road and let other drivers merge into my lane in traffic. Trust me when I say that this is an act of kindness on my part.
Second are friends who let me bounce ideas off them. I have an Undefined Head Center and there’s a never-ending stream of ideas floating around in my head. It can feel overwhelming (mental pressure), so I'm thankful that my friends are kind enough to give me some of their time, energy and attention to bounce ideas off them.
Third--I live in a gated community, but I live near the main entrance gate. I often see the FedEx, UPS, DHL, Amazon delivery drivers drive up to the gate, but they don't always know how or are able to get past the gate.
So, if I see a driver stuck, I’ll let them in so my neighbors, who are expecting their deliveries are able to get their packages delivered on time. It’s a little something that I don't mind doing, if I see it happen.
Lastly, three things that I either did well or that I like about myself..
One - I'm a curious person which is my One Profile Line. I really love being curious means that I'm always learning. This is one of many things that’s been so validating about learning my Human Design—that I’m going to be a forever learner of the things that I have a deep interest in.
Two - I'm always open to trying new things. This is my 3rd Profile Line talking. One thing that I've tried recently is opening myself up to self-photography—not selfies—but using the backside of the camera.
Well first, we all have smartphones with very good, very expensive cameras. I have an Outer Vision cognition and visually interesting, well-shot photos always capture my attention, so, why not learn how to use this camera that's with me all the time to take better photos?
I’m not camera shy. I’m always up for mugging it in front of the lens, but like many women, I tend to nitpick my photos and not like photos of myself. So, I joined a photo club to learn to take high quality photos while also learning how to embrace self-photos—not selfies.
It’s been fun trying something different and exploring this part of me that I hadn’t explored before.
The third thing that I’m doing well, and I like about myself is that I'm making progress on the masterclass that I'm creating, “Food, Mood & Design: Decode Your Body’s Signals.”
If you listened to one of the recent episodes I did with Nadia, I forget which one of the two-parters it was in, but I shared that I’m redesigning my offer suite, taking my current offerings, tweaking them a bit, and repackaging with new spins on them. This master class is part of it – it’s the middle of the offering ecosystem.
First there’s the “Energy Mapping 101” free guide, followed by, “Design to Thrive: The Gentle Guide to Human Design.” And the next is this masterclass that there is a waitlist for which, I’ll include a link in the show notes at www.livefablife.com/314 for Episode 314.
This masterclass is in the middle of the ecosystem so there will be things coming after it, but I’m making good progress and I’m on track for the timeline I’ve set so it's going well and I’m doing well with it.
Now, I’d love to hear what your three things are, maybe what’s one thing that you're finding fun and joyful; one piece of kindness that someone extended to you, or that you've shown to someone else; and then what’s one thing that you've done well or that you like about yourself? Come over and share them with me.
Okay, let’s get back to what we're here to chat about today.
When it comes to your wellness, if you’ve ever thought, “Well, I know what to do, but I just can't seem to make myself do it.” or “Gosh, I started off strong, but now I’ve fallen off track. What is wrong with me?!” my hope is that this episode sets you free from this thinking.
Because, as we’ve discussed in the first two parts of this mini-series, it's not you that's failing. It's not your lack of willpower or a lack of discipline--it's the wellness practice that you've been following or trying to follow that clashes with your natural energy flow, i.e., your Human Design.
You don't have a discipline issue. It's a decision-making issue, and your Human Design has everything to do with this.
I know I’m not the only one who was taught from a very, very early age that success is about discipline. I have very distinct memories from when I was about three or four years old--and I know that's how old I was based upon the location of my memories and who was there.
So, at about three or four years old, I distinctly remember playing on the floor, and listening to the adults sitting around the dining table talking about “so and so” people and their problems, how their kids were unruly because they weren’t disciplined enough, and adults weren't trying hard enough. I'm sure if I brought up these memories to those adults today, they wouldn't remember those conversations, but I didn't make up these memories—they’re too adult-themed for a preschooler to come up with on their own.
Ideas and impressions like this have been imprinted on me since I was very, very, young, and as I got older, they were even more enforced with comments like, “Be the best today!” and they eventually morphed into “Hustle harder!” and “Grind longer!”
The point I'm trying to make is that these kinds of beliefs and mindset became so ingrained in me that I honestly didn't know that there was any other way to be.
For context, go back to Episode 189 where I shared my reflections on what it was like to grow up as a Projector surrounded entirely by Generators and Manifesting Generators--not only in my immediate family, but in my extended family too, so I was really, really, really influenced and essentially conditioned to operate as someone who has a Defined Sacral Center as Generators and Manifesting Generators do.
But here's the truth, and this is the point that I want to make today, “Discipline without aligned decision-making burns you out faster.” It's like having a map to the wrong destination or when your GPS takes you the long way instead of like the shorter, more direct way.
You're showing up. You're doing the work, but it's not the work that's aligned for you or maybe the aligned way to go about doing it.
So, let's talk about decision-making.
Decision-making is a life skill that is necessary for each one of us. It requires having trust and confidence in ourselves so that we can be assured that we're making the correct decisions with the correct timing.
But what happens when you don't have trust and confidence in yourself to make the correct decisions?
You suffer from decision fatigue. We've all suffered from decision fatigue, but I have one friend in particular who suffers from it more than anyone else that I've ever known in my life. It’s paralyzing.
Decision fatigue is the exhaustion that you feel from having to make hundreds of micro decisions every day--what to eat, should you work out, what kind of workout to do, what to wear, are you being productive enough? The list is endless.
But if you don't trust your body signals, if you're always second guessing your choices, if you're constantly tweaking your plans instead of just living your life, you're going to feel like you're doing everything and still getting nowhere.
I've talked about that feeling before—the feeling that you’re doing all the things but not doing any of it well. It’s the feeling that, often, happens just before burnout. It’s a red flag the burnout is just around the corner.
You feel like you're doing everything, but you're still not getting anywhere. You're always questioning yourself, and always seeking validation from others, trying to do what others are doing--people with completely different energy systems than you.
But despite every pro and pros and cons list that you make, every advice you seek, you’re still overthinking and making decisions from your mind.
But your mind wasn't built to make decisions--your Authority was. Let me repeat this again--Your mind isn’t built to make decisions--your Authority is.
So, question for you—"Where in your wellness routine or your wellness practices, are you overthinking instead of just listening?”
This is the heart of Human Design. When it comes to health, wellness and Human Design, most people want to go straight to the Variables—Human Design Digestion—but to me, the key is your Human Design Authority.
You weren't meant to make decisions from your mind. You have this inner compass--your inner navigation system—called your Authority, and each Authority has its own rhythm and language.
I've talked about Authorities dozens and dozens of times and will probably talk about it dozens of times more, including right now.
Emotional Authorities: You need time. Your clarity comes with emotional neutrality, and not at the peak of a high or the pit of a low moment.
Sacral Authorities: Your gut knows immediately if the decision is a “hell yes” or “hell no.” Trust your gut.
Splenic Authorities: You get intuitive hits in the instant moment. It's quiet, it's fast, but it's always spot on. I speak from experience as having a Splenic Authority.
Self-Projected Authorities: You need to talk it out. When you hear your voice, you hear your truth. The thoughts and opinions of who you’re speaking to doesn’t matter.
Ego Authorities: You need to want something deeply. It’s aligned when it feels like it's your personal truth, what you truly desire from the deepest parts of your heart.
Mental Authorities: Clarity comes through externalizing and being in the right space with the right people. It’s all about your environment.
Lunar Authorities: Time is your superpower. Your clarity unfolds over the full moon cycle.
What's your authority? Think back to a decision that you made relating to your wellness that backfired. Were you overriding your Authority?
Having a Splenic Authority, sometimes, clarity hits me immediately, right at that moment, and I just know what the correct decision to be made is. Other times, nothing comes--neither a yes nor a no. But then it comes later, and the decision comes to me out of nowhere. Often, I can't explain the logicality behind it, but I just know it's the right call.
But at times, I still fall back into overthinking. I’ve had years of conditioning and its not something that we overcome the minute we become aware of it; it's a lifelong practice.
I've been dealing with an injury for the past six months and I've been in physical therapy for it for the past three months. Recently, I've been feeling a lot better—in fact, I’ve been feeling pretty darn good and thought I upped the intensity of my workouts again.
Shortly after this injury hit, I took up Pvolve. It's a fitness system that combines Pilates, yoga, strength training and low impact cardio, all-in-one. Jennifer Aniston is the face of the brand, and an investor. Several years ago, she was dealing with injury herself, and a friend introduced her to Pvolve, and she fell in love with it, became an investor and the face of the company.
So, last Fall, when I these injuries hit, and I knew that I needed to find a way to still be able to move, so I went all in on Pvolve. Long story short, there's one piece of equipment called the P-ball. If you're curious as to what it is, I'll include a link to it in the show notes.
Whenever I use the P-Ball, it aggravates my hip injury, which also shows up as back and groin pain. But, like I said, with physical therapy, I'd been feeling great for the past several weeks, I jumped in and went all out for a P-Ball workout. But the whole time, I heard this voice telling me to still be cautious, “Don't push yourself too much," it said.
But I let my ego take it over, went all out, and guess what? I found myself back to square one with the injury pain occurring all over again. Had I listened to that whispered voice, my Splenic Authority, I could’ve avoided this setback.
So, back to my question: “Think back to a wellness decision that backfired. Were you overriding your Authority?”
Here’s what I want you to take from this episode: You’re not meant to decide like everyone else. Wellness plans fail not because you're weak, but because you're trying to follow someone else's process, someone else's time frames and make decisions like someone else.
Most of the wellness advice out there is Sacra-led, which isn't surprising, as 70% of the population has Defined Sacral centers. Much of our society is based upon having a Defined Sacral Center. But Sacral decision-making--listening to your gut—is only meant for Sacral Authorities.
What if you're an Emotional Authority? That doesn't work because you need time. What if you're a Splenic Authority? You need space to hear that inner quiet voice. What if you're a Self-Projected Authority? You need people to bounce ideas off.
You can't force clarity. You observe, listen and honor it. But when you're out of sync and you're missed aligned, it often sounds like:
“I just have to try harder.” “Maybe I just need a whole new plan.” “I need to be more disciplined.”
But what you actually need is to pause, to self-observe and then check in with your Authority. Stop overthinking and forcing decisions from your mind.
Your wellness doesn't need to be perfect; it needs to be personalized for you.
So, let's recap what we covered today:
Most of your wellness struggles come from decision fatigue, not a lack of discipline, not a lack of willpower and not for a lack of trying.
My friend, your Human Design Authority is your guide, it’s how you’re built to make aligned choices. And when you stop outsourcing your decisions and start honoring your energy, you stop burning out.
If this hits home for you, download my free guide, “Energy Mapping 101”, to understand your energy, or if you're ready to start to stop guessing and start aligning, grab “Designed to Thrive: A Gentle Guide to Human Design. It’s your next step towards personalized, sustainable wellness.
Let me leave you with this reflection: What’s one decision that you've been making from your mind that you want to start making with your Authority?
And with that, I will, as our friend Nadia says, I’ll love you and leave you. Thank you so much for listening. I always appreciate your time, energy and your attention and I’ll see you right back here again next time. Bye for now!
Naomi Nakamura is a Health x Human Design coach who’s creating a healthier society through aligned energy.
She blends a bespoke mix of Functional Nutrition and Human Design to help others shift into alignment to leverage and correctly manage their energy to support their body, mind, and spirit.
She believes that when we embrace our authenticity and lean into our bio-individuality, we naturally live a life of freedom, empowerment, and optimal health.
Naomi resides in the San Francisco Bay Area and can often be found exploring the area with her puppy girl, Coco Pop!
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